beck test depression
Do I honestly have depression? Im so confused with myself!?
I’ve seen my therapist twice and she made me do a depression test to see how depressed I am. Apparently I scored pretty darn high. Then I did Beck Depression Inventory today, and I scored above a 30++ so that would mean depression as well.
But you see, the problem is… I know I’m not happy. I fantasize about stepping in front of a bus, I just attempted suicide 4 days ago, I know I seriously dislike myself, I feel like an absolute failure, I feel worthless, my future is bleak beyond hope. But there are also times when I feel alright. Like now. I’ve been feeling… close-to normal these past 2 days. It’s hard to describe it. But I get depressed immediately once someone hits a trigger. Then I go into this whole self loathing state of mind. But I get out of it, if someone’s there to keep my mind off it. I don’t find it too hard to concentrate anymore. I’m starting to eat again. I don’t know, this is so confusing.
Am I well again?
You need to get different medication. Whatever they’re giving you isn’t working.
Depression is a biological imbalance of serotonin and or your synapses not functioning properly.
You might only have to take a low level antidepressant for about 6 months to get your levels straightened out!
You must tell your counselor that you feel like committing suicide. You must call someone when you feel like this! Call 1800 suicide. They’ll be glad to talk to you!
Good luck